The last entry until 1st of December...

Don’t feel like writing today. In fact I can predict the same for tomorrow too. The festive season has really infected me. The enthusiasm for working like slave has vanished. My level of day dreaming about holiday and eating RENDANG DAGING, RENDANG AYAM, KETUPAT, NASI HIMPIT, BRASAK, LEMANG, KUAH LODE, KUAH KACANG, SOTO, SERUNDING, DODOL, ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT FESTIVE SEASON FOODS has become extremely dangerous.

To the point of making me sick looking at my dumb cubicle and heartless computer. For the cubicle has just started to look like a giant KETUPAT and the computer is now a big brown DODOL. Aggghhhhhh!

And honestly, what’s the point of working if this elderly engineer next to my cubicle (FEMALE engineer) was talking about these new clothes and new recipes for HARI RAYA while the guy sitting in front of me was talking to another colleague of mine about how much money was spend during this HARI RAYA.

Damn it! Every body is talking about the holiday!!!!!

So I take this oppurtunity to ask forgiveness of any wrongdoings that I’ve done before. May the blessed month of Ramadhan brings peace and prosperity to the whole world and not like what had happened nowadays. It is sick and unfortunate.

Again, before my entry becomes too religious, to all people out there, whether muslim or non muslims – May God Bless You...

See you on the first of December!!!!!!

SELAMAT HARI RAYA (EID MUBARAK)!

THE IDIOT'S GUIDE TO GREAT BRITAIN

(..for MR. BUSH as he visits BRITAIN this week)

That's this itty bitty country due east of the States where folks talk kinda weird, Mr President


1, LONDON is the capital of the UK which is an independent country and not your 51st State.

2, OUR Sovereign is Queen Elizabeth II (that's pronounced second not eleven). You must not put your arm around her and call her "honey" or "l'il lady". She is to be addressed as "Your Majesty" or "Ma'am" at all times.

3, HER eldest son is called Prince Charles not "Chuck". Don't talk to him about butlers, valets or ask him if he's seen any good videos.

4, WHEN you sit down to a state banquet you use the cutlery starting from the outside. Big Mac and fries won't be on the menu.

5, THE RAF won the Battle of Britain not Tom Cruise or Bruce Willis.

6, WE live in a democracy and as such have the right to demonstrate so if your route is lined with thousands of anti-war protesters, don't ask for them to be extradited to Camp X-ray.

7, WE say trousers not pants - unless of course we are referring to your foreign policy.

8, WILLIAM Shakespeare, our greatest playwright, wrote Romeo and Juliet, not Zefferelli. Don't ask to meet Will - he's dead.

9, BE sure to register for the congestion charge when your motorcade drives through London or mayor Ken Livingstone will hit you with a £40 fine for every car.

10, WE put milk in our tea, not ice, have toast not waffles for breakfast and walk on the pavement not the sidewalk.

Have a nice day...not!

P/s: Mr. President.. it has been 199 days by the way since Saddam was thrown from his government, but why WMD has not been found yet?

Taken from The Mirror

2 Qs to sum up all the Qs in the world

To men: Do you prefer girls who don’t like make up and girlish things or opted for the girlish type or girls in between?
Hint: Girlish type means girls who has sort of bimbo-like characters and girls in-between demonstrate both type of characters moderately.

To women: In this modern world, what is the most important thing you want from men and what is the sensible women behaviour that is appropriate for women?
Hint: “Sensible women behavoiur” means is it okay to over-reacted in showing feminism eg. going to toilet wearing make-up etc. OR is it okay to be over- dependent on men

Because I am in the former category, I myself will have to answer the guestion. I like girls who can think and act with maturity. Girls should show their feminism most of the time moderately. Over-dependent for me is a sign of weakness and as I see women with the highest regard, I don’t like women that are too dependent of something. For me it’s lame or in malay word, “Mengada-ngada sangat!”

Honestly, I like intelligent women. Not in the sense of academic achievement but how she leads her life to the fullest is what attracts me most. And good smell. Yes. they don’t have to wear expensive perfumes. Just the kind of smell that will give a lasting impression so that I will remember her even if she’s not around.

If I ever found the girl of my dream, I wouldn’t let her go. And If have to sacrifice my soul just to get close to her, I would voluntarily do it for eternity....

Groovy!!

Okay, I admit I just being so juvenile. But I can feel that I’m having two HARI RAYA (eid mubarak) instead of one. ALMOST.

The reason? Do you see the LOTR marathon movie up there? Do you? The sweet smell of victory is in the air. That’s my ticket to the movie marathon by the way. It’s mine. My prrrreecioussssss...

I know it’s cynical.. but hey, if people could wait hours and hours outside the stadium before their favourite football team match, OR hours before LINKIN PARK concert even started, OR doing something stupid just to get themselves on Guinness Record or America Funniest people TV shows OR embarassing themselves with off-pitched songs in say, AKEDEMI FANTASIA, would I be denied then with this sweet little happiness?

back to the future

Do you ever ponder why is that nowadays, time seems to shrink quicker than it was when we were a kid?

I remember lying lazily in front of the TV at 9 am in the morning waiting for Iftar (break-fasting). It seemed at that time the clock has some sort of problem to move it’s hand to the next second. Oh! I was 10 by the way.

And the school holiday. Like forever.

I used to go back to my grandma’s house from the first day of the holiday until the penultimate day before the new school semester started. It was fun. Every day venturing to the unknown of palm oil plantatation as if it was the thick jungle of Borneo. And diving into the river in it. Yeah it seemed forever. And new things to learn everyday...

We only KNEW one word back then – FUN.

But now our lives have changed. It seems Thursday to the next Thursday is only a matter of minutes. The only consolation is the week end. But still when you get back to work every boring Monday, you’d wish it was still Saturday.

And our vocabulary has changed too – ROUTINE

Oh! And it has become more – ROUTINE and RESPONSIBILITY.

Not to mention that the phase has QUICKEN too.

What about those who got children of their own? I guess childhood happiness was a forgotten memories after all.

I wish somebody would invent a time machine so that I would be in the state of happinees forever...

Hmmm... can’t wait to go to grandma’s again this week....

Girls I hate going out with!

Who is my dream girl? Any body but;

1. Girls who work in the clinic/pharmacy, the ones that give medicine to patients.
It just seems awkward even to think about it. Imagine trying to have a romantic conversation with one.

GIRL: Sir, this pill is for relieving your rectal constipation. Need to insert the pill in to your anus and then you have to wait a little while longer. Do not try to “push it out”. Otherwise you might get pile.

ME: Uh… uh… Okay… Err... Err… You look so lovely. Can we go out together tonight?

GIRL: Okay. But make sure you do as I say first. Wouldn’t be much fun dining out in the 5 star hotel if your keep having stomach ache because you can’t defecate, would it?

I feel that she “knows” me even before our first date started!

2. Girls who work as a cashier in the men’s section.
A stranger that knows your personal things isn’t to my liking. I would rather chop down my head than going out with them.

GIRL: Two XXXL boxers and a 20% discounted brief. That would be RM 4.60, sir!

It is not about people knowing you are wearing a very cheap brief and boxer. It is the feeling of awkwardness. It’s an invasion of your own private world.

I feel she “knows” me and “has exposed” me to the whole wide world. Damn it!

3. Girls who work in the bank, particularly in debt department.

GIRL: Sir, I have checked your credit card account. It seems that you have not paid for over 5 months now. You need to pay RM 700 within 7 working days. Otherwise, we have to take legal action on you.

ME: (Gulp)… Okay I’ll try. (Pause) Are you Emma? The one that send me a birthday card 10 years ago?

GIRL: Are you XXXXX? Ah! This is so wonderful! Nice meeting you here!

ME: You look beautiful… Err… Are you going out for lunch today? Let’s go together. There is this restaurant at the corner that serves delicious pizza. It would be great. My treat…

GIRL: (Smiling) I wonder you have the money to ask me for lunch when you are so tight in paying your debt!

ME: Err… Err…

She has metaphorically stripped me naked!

((Please do not be offended by my insignificant little thought. I am not being prejudice towards girls working in the above-mentioned departments. It is a preference over matters. An idiosyncrasy. An eccentricity. And that’s what makes every human a unique individual. In this case, it’s me. JUST ME…))

BAD MOVIES

I hate bad movies. Especially if you have to waste your precious 2 to 3 hours of your time sitting in front of the TV/DVD (..Or watching it in the cinema) but by the end of it, you were virtually left confused and not knowing what the hell you were just watching.

Talking about bad movies, I should remind myself of BATMAN & ROBIN – the forth instalment of BATMAN film series, where they have this cameo of BATGIRL showing her buttocks rather than her acting skill. I hated the film. Hated it that I thought it was my turning point to severing my ties with all BATMAN related things.

I don’t have any grudge about them wearing the leather-tight spandex. Nor their stupid-looking nipples that protruding out of the jackets. I wouldn’t dream to steal any of those things.

It’s just that how the movie was directed from the start to finish. The plot and the script were very weak and dull. It was more of a joke on BATMAN than uplifting the good image of him.

Then there is this JOHNNY NMEMONIC. It really frustrated to see KEANU REEVES acted like a pyromaniac lunatic with a hard disk stuck in his head. Lucky he redeemed himself in SPEED and THE MATRIX.

And WATERWORLD, which I think KEVIN COSTNER should go deep to the bottom of the sea and never to resurface again.

GLITTER of MARIAH CAREY and CROSSROAD of BRITNEY SPEARS was a disaster. The same goes to EVITA of MADONNA. And all of JENNIFER LOPEZ films. They should stick to singing in my humble opinion. MARIAH CAREY especially. O God, please make her stop acting.

Others in my top ten (ten + ten honestly) bad movies are THE ADVENTURE OF PLUTO NASH, KILLER TOMATO, POWER RANGERS MOVIE, FROM JUSTIN TO KELLY, SPEED 2, UNIVERSAL SOLDIER, STOP! OR MY MUM WILL SHOOT, DUMB AND DUMBERER: WHEN HARRY MET LYYOD, STAR TREK, STREET FIGHTER... to name but a few!

Oh! and they say GIGLI of BEN AFFLECK and JENNIFER LOPEZ has been voted as the worst ever film ever made in the history of cinematic world. Haven’t seen it but by looking at the cast members, one wouldn’t disagree with the decision.

And Good movies are the ones that create lasting impression to movie goers. Example like THE MATRIX trilogy, FORREST GUMP, THE LORD OF THE RINGS, THE LORD OF THE RINGS and THE LORD OF THE RINGS!!!

Well, since we are talking about movies today, I am in jolly good mood today. Guess what? I’ve finally got my THE LORD OF THE RINGS marathon movie ticket. YES! YES! YES! I’ve got the ticket. AT LAST.

Hmm.. It will start at about 11 PM and finish at 10 AM or something like that. I guess I should bring my SARONG and prayer mat to the cinema, then. Ooh! ooh! Not forgetting a very thick duvet, a jug of hot coffee and mosquito coils. Errr.. is there any mosquitos in the cinema?

I might see few bloggers during the show, KAZ and YAZ, you’re both coming right? It is going to be fun I supposed, and challeging considering that I need to stay vigil all night long!

It’s a fan appreciation to PETER JACKSON for bringing the world of MIDDLE-EARTH to life by going to 10 hours movie marathon. I guess it’s a crazy commitment. But who cares?

Escaping terror?

Escaping terror of me own doing, more like. Yesterday was such a divvy. I was a divvy, me. Nonetheless, it’s such a worthy case of experience. Better stick it into your heads, mates. Next time, when you come across a red light, PLEASE BLOODY STOP.

And I wasn’t. You see, my car insurance and road tax expired on last Friday. But I wasn’t quick enough to do my bidding. I let go Friday thinking I could always do it the next day. Codswallop! Didn’t know (or crap enough not knowing about it!) that they’re having some flashharry party on Saturday while I left to rotten alone with my now-illegal car covered with now-invalid car insurance and now-expired road tax. Thing was that, they’re closed on the first and third week every month, the bank and the insurance company.

3 stinking days to wait until the much-awaited day appeared (that was Monday the yesterday although I did not really recalled myself rejoicing when every other Monday came)


So with my good driver conscience, I went yesterday to renew mine. Everything’s banging except when I took a turn to the bank (for road tax renewal and all). There was this traffic light with hundreds of cars congested like hungry ants on left over toffees. Stuck there for almost twenty minutes. Smashing record of nearly a half hour!!

Being in a hurry, with the other cars kept honking; I was indeed getting impatient. Thus when chances came, I just ignored the yellow-turned-red light but drove on and relieving the prospect of laughing those who couldn’t make it. Two cars (a MERCEDES and a HONDA) followed closely behind. And funnily yeah, I would have the last laugh.

There, not very far from us, two traffic policemen stood unmoving like some giants ready to catch and swallow us. One of them waved slowly (but firm) so that our cars moved to the roadside. I drove like it was my first driving session, obediently and so innocently.

But hey, the policeman took no notice of me. He moved towards THAT two cars (MERC and HONDA) and his mate urged me to drive on.

Was I so lucky? (HO HO!)

Or was it because of my MALAYSIAN car?

Or was it because those policemen have got some bad experiences with MERC and HONDA drivers before? Perhaps they lose to them during one of those car racing err.. err.. car chasing last time?

Anyway, think of the consequence of my car being stopped. I might be charged with several offends :- No road tax for three days, ignoring the traffic light, and may be punching the police man for not letting me go and renewing my road tax... or worse, I could kill them!

I could end up my days counting the number of visitors visiting me in the prison. Sigh....

Nasty thought, eh? But that doesn’t mean I was so jolly for escaping the law that I straightaway changed the Clutter World lay out. No.. The idea of changing the template came before the incident. Though I wouldn’t denied the experience has got some role in my being today, if not the trauma. (You kidding! Who would?)

Some BLOGGERS experience a degree of difficulties when browsing through OLD Clutter World and hence the new lay out. But I do miss the little boy picture sitting near the pond. A good friend of mine, said that she liked the old Clutter World BLOG better. She also said that the colour tone was softer before. Err.. err.. I am speechless and have nowt to say....

I guess I couldn’t satisfy every body, could I?

Ah! And if you still thinking that I am a bad person and deserve a summon at the VERY least; well TA-NO-END, then...

But TA VERY MUCH!